Inside Out
Over the years I’ve journeyed ever deeper to process my own ‘stuff’. Nowadays, while working with clients, gaining insights through professional and MSc Neuroscience & Psychology research and continuing my personal growth work, I see clearly the link between what’s happening now and past experiences.
If a perceived or real threat remains unprocessed and physical reminders of the original event repeat, our innate coping strategies can quicken to become more intense as life progresses. This can keep us stuck.
You’ve likely heard of fight and flight responses. They’re the body’s way of keeping us safe when alarm bells go off in our psyche. ‘Aggh, I’m under threat’. These visceral signals act as as a first line of defence. The body’s antenna is quicker than the mind. There is also disassociation - when our mind and body become frozen or ‘disconnected’ because of events too overwhelming to mentally process in real-time.
Interestingly, root cause events that trigger these alarm bells include formative experiences perceived as completely insignificant to our adult minds, plus those forgotten altogether.
For example, to our sponge-like childhood nervous systems, being laughed at in the playground, shouted at by a caregiver, left to cry oneself to sleep, were at the time frightening experiences that can get hard-wired as I’m wrong, unloved, alone. Even the experience of our birth, oftentimes traumatising on some level as we moved from warm safety into this strange new world, can have life long consequences.
Additionally, early experiences can unfortunately be more extreme than this*, while new types of shocks can occur during adulthood to overload a previously calm nervous system.
When feelings and emotions are too intense to understand and be processed in real-time, our self-protection strategies tend to move into our embodied neural pathways, so we know what to do to self-protect, should similar hard situations arise again. However, the helpfulness of this stored information can get skewed, and emerge out of our unconscious long term-storage, to play out in ways that ultimately sabotage. The expression of which may look something like anxiety, over-working, burnout, physical or mental illness, addictions, avoidance, suppression, difficult relationships, eating disorders, sleep disturbances, fatigue, unwanted manifestations and the like.
Conversely, never under estimate the gift of ingrained or retrained empowering beliefs and behaviours, coupled with a calm nervous system. This can form a healthy cornerstone for your life.
Processing your past and accessing ways to consciously create from a perspective of clarity and peace of mind in the present, can forever change the course of your future for the better.
To live your life filled with greater peace, fulfilment and purpose. To live your life as you truly, deeply want. Really.
* if experiencing extreme trauma, PTSD or you are processing sustained abuse, a therapeutic ‘bottom-up’ body-based approach may be a wise first step, or other specialised trauma based therapy suitable for your individual circumstances.